Motivation vs. Manipulation

There is a difference You see the kids on task and behaving, and it’s natural to want to reinforce what they’re doing. By the same token, the kids who are dragging their feet or not doing their work (or chores) may need a bit of a fire lit under them. There are positive and effective…

Presentation: The Perfection Deception

Why trying to be perfect is sabotaging our relationships, making us sick, and holding our happiness hostage Presentation by Dr. Jane Bluestein Perfectionism may sound like a good thing, but it’s entirely different from the more realistic and achievable healthy pursuit of excellence. Working diligently toward improvement, learning, and growth is also far less destructive (and…

Book: The Perfection Deception

Why trying to be perfect is sabotaging your relationships, making you sick, and holding your happiness hostage. Save 15% off regular price. Have you ever: * compared yourself to others and seemed to come up short? * felt like no matter how much you did or how hard you tried, it wasn’t enough? * set…

Bibliography for The Perfection Deception

Resources for Bluestein Perfectionism Book Note: The following list includes the resources cited in the book, The Perfection Deception. Contributions are identified as obtained through email, written correspondence, personal messages, posts or comments on social media, telephone conversations, or face-to-face interviews or conversations between March 2013 and June 2015. This list does not include individuals…

Checklist: Characteristics of Healthy Parent-Child Relationships

Evaluate your relationships Use this checklist to evaluate patterns in your current relationships with the children in your life (or even other adults in your life). If you have implemented a specific discipline or motivation approach, does it encourage relationships in which the following are true? Proactivity: ___ I focus on prevention–not reaction. ___ I…

How Do You Parent?

Noticing patterns in parenting styles Let’s examine your current parenting patterns and values. In each pair of statements, mark the one that you identify with most strongly, the one that “feels” most like you. ___ I respect the fact that my child has different tastes than I do. ___ I am often embarrassed by my…

Preventing Bullying in the Digital Age

Understanding and managing cyberspace aggression Guest blogger Amy Williams shares what to watch for and how to prevent meanness in the digital age. The ripple effect of bullying can be felt across all lanes of life. Similar to raging drivers on the road, aggressive Internet users can create a threatening environment for the people around them….

Product: “Pads” on the Back

Like Getting a Hug on Paper by Dr. Jane Bluestein & Dr. Lynn Collins Now available as Post-It® Notes! After selling the last of thousands of the original product, we decided to reprint these “Pads,” this time as a set of sticky notes. The new pads are now available as a 5-pack of 50-page Post-It® notes, with…

9 Ways to Encourage Your Children’s Individuality

Appreciating your children’s uniqueness Even if your children are the spitting image of you, unless they are clones, you know that they are going to be different from you. And if you do indeed have more than one, they are going to be different from one another. This uniqueness contributes to the “personality” of your family, a potential…