My Parents Don’t Trust Me!

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 13, 2022 Building responsibility, Counselors, Motivating cooperation, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, Students, Win-win parenting authority being reliable, being responsible, establishing trust, getting parents to trust you, rebuilding trust Leave a comment

Helping kids establish (or re-establish) trust with parents Excerpted and adapted from High School’s Not Forever by Dr. Jane Bluestein and Eric Katz, MSAC (2005, Health Communications, Inc, Deerfield Beach, FL). This piece was written for teens and young people, and is included on this site for parents, teachers, counselors, coaches, and others who work with…

Bully-Proofing Kids

By Dr. Michele BorbaJune 11, 2022June 12, 2022 Counselors, Creating community, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Health and Safety, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, SEL- Social and Emotional Learning, Uncategorized building independence, bully-proofing, bullying, comebacks to bullies, confidence, dignity, kids and power, reducing vulnerability, strategies for dealing with bullies, teaching assertiveness Leave a comment

Real strategies to teach kids so they are less likely to be bullied Adapted from an article sent to me by Dr. Michele Borba in 2011. Some of the language was modified to shift away from the term “victim” to emphasize a more self-empowered term: “target.” And although this article was originally written for parents,…

Stop Telling Me How Lucky I Am!

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 2, 2022June 2, 2022 Counselors, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Feedback and encouragement, General Interest, Gratitude and inspiration, Life Management, Mental Health, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, Relationships, SEL- Social and Emotional Learning, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth, Taking care of yourself acceptance, emotions, feeling feelings, feelings, friendship, gratitude, gratitude as a drug, hearing me, listening, processing emotions, reality, respect, suppressed feelings, validation Leave a comment

5 things to do instead I was having a really bad stretch at work. A cold, rainy week had left my students stir-crazy, loud, and barely manageable. I’d had an encounter with an angry parent (whose child wasn’t even in my class). And my administrator still hadn’t responded to several requests for basic supplies we…

Book: The Beginning Teacher’s Survival Guide

By Dr. Jane BluesteinAugust 13, 2021April 27, 2023 Assessment and Testing, Avoiding burnout, Avoiding power struggles, Beginning Teachers, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Body and Brain, Books, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Creating community, Cultural Changes, Culture and Community, Discipline, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Feedback and encouragement, Health and Safety, Homework, Increasing Positivity, Intervening negative behavior, Leadership, Learning, Learning styles, Life Management, Mentorship, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Non-traditional learners, Parent-Teacher relationships, Problem solving, Professional growth, Recognition and reinforcement, Relationships, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Schools in Society, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth, Special Needs, Taking care of yourself, Teacher Appreciation, Teacher retention, Teaching, Teaching, Tolerance and Respect, Win-win authority avoiding power struggles, beginning teachers, boundaries, challenges for new teachers, creating community, difficult students, discipline, emotional safety, emotionally safe classroom, learning differences, parent-teacher relationships, positive consequences, professional development feedback, professional growth, professional identity, school culture, self-care, student behavior, student self-management, teacher retention, teaching

Win-Win Strategies for Success by Dr. Jane Bluestein At the start or your career or at the end of your rope… Get your teaching career off to a winning start—or recharge your passion for your work! The new & revised edition of Dr. Jane Bluestein’s pivotal guide for your teaching career! A great gift for new…

Dream Big!

By Dr. Jane BluesteinNovember 16, 2017June 10, 2022 Counselors, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Feedback and encouragement, General Interest, Increasing Positivity, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating your kids, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, Social and Emotional Growth "i can", creativity, dream big, dreaming, emotional support, encouragement, fantasies, inspiration, listening, modeling, positivity, protectiveness, supporting children, unconditional love Leave a comment

Encouraging your children’s fantasies—and their future! It’s something a child hears often: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” A simple, even rhetorical question. But for children, this is a serious inquiry that can also be a great opportunity to share their ambitions, dreams, and creative longings. Even if the answers vary…

“Constructive Differencing” Notes and Highlights

By Dr. Jane BluesteinAugust 29, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Creating community, Cultural Changes, Culture and Community, Educators, General Interest, Parents, Problem solving, Relationships, School climate, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect Leave a comment

How to disagree and still maintain contact The following offers additional resource material related to the conversation with Dr. Jared Scherz, (audio file/podcast). The main points include: One of the most stress-producing obstacles in any relationship is the need to be right when it requires others to be wrong. Differences in school systems occur on…

Bouncing Back

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 4, 2016June 9, 2022 Creating community, Culture and Community, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Health and Safety, Increasing Positivity, Problem solving, School climate, Schools in Society, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect asset-building, bouncing back, emotional safety, emotional support, emotionally safe classroom, prevention, protective factors, resilience, resiliency, response to stress, risk factors, school failure, school success Leave a comment

The art of resiliency Excerpt from “Emotional Safety: Personal and Character Development,” from chapter 15 of Creating Emotionally Safe Schools by Dr. Jane Bluestein © 2001, Health Communications, Inc., Deerfield Beach, FL. This excerpt was extracted from the manuscript for this book and may be slightly different from the actual printed copy. The entire bibliography of Creating Emotionally Safe Schools is…

Stress-Producing Obstacles in Relationships

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 30, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Educators, General Interest, Overcoming obstacles, Problem solving, Relationships, Self-care and Inspiration, Taking care of yourself, Win-win authority, Win-win parenting authority agendas for others, assumptions, autonomy, being present, being right, blame, change, conflict, consciousness, control, criticism, dependence, double standards, expectations, fear of abandonment, judgment, listening, making others wrong, overreacting, perfectionism, personal growth, reactivity, relationships, respect, shaming 2 Comments

Patterns to avoid Want to reduce conflict, pain, and alienation in relationships with the important people in your life? Here are some of the patterns that make connecting difficult. (Some suggestions for resolution below.) • Needing to be in charge or in control, especially when it depends on disempowering or controlling others, or when it disregards…

Ways to Build Tolerance and Respect for Diversity

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 1, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Creating community, Culture and Community, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Parents, Problem solving, School climate, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect acceptance, appreciating others, appreciation for diversity, classroom social dynamics, friendship skills, leadership skills in children, opportunities for service, respect, respect for diversity, respecting differences, social competence in children, social interaction, sociograms, status among students, student social behavior, teaching tolerance, tolerance Leave a comment

Practical strategies for positive change • Pay attention to peer-to-peer interactions. Increase awareness, advocacy, and a willingness to take immediate, positive action (regarding how kids treat one another). • Advocate for the underdog. Encourage kids to connect with children who seem isolated. Emphasize the value of inclusion. • Interrupt any instances of meanness, name calling,…

Checklist: Characteristics of Positive Teacher-Student Relationships

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 15, 2015May 2, 2022 Avoiding power struggles, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Counselors, Creating community, Discipline, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Intervening negative behavior, Leadership, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Parent-Teacher relationships, Problem solving, Recognition and reinforcement, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Win-win authority 2 Comments

Evaluate your relationships Use this checklist to evaluate patterns in your current relationships with your students. If you have implemented a specific discipline or motivation approach, does it encourage relationships in which the following are true? (Click here for a description of each category.) Proactivity: ___ I focus on prevention–not reaction. ___ I attempt to…