Dream Big!

By Dr. Jane BluesteinNovember 16, 2017June 10, 2022 Counselors, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Feedback and encouragement, General Interest, Increasing Positivity, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating your kids, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, Social and Emotional Growth "i can", creativity, dream big, dreaming, emotional support, encouragement, fantasies, inspiration, listening, modeling, positivity, protectiveness, supporting children, unconditional love Leave a comment

Encouraging your children’s fantasies—and their future! It’s something a child hears often: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” A simple, even rhetorical question. But for children, this is a serious inquiry that can also be a great opportunity to share their ambitions, dreams, and creative longings. Even if the answers vary…

“Constructive Differencing” Notes and Highlights

By Dr. Jane BluesteinAugust 29, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Creating community, Cultural Changes, Culture and Community, Educators, General Interest, Parents, Problem solving, Relationships, School climate, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect Leave a comment

How to disagree and still maintain contact The following offers additional resource material related to the conversation with Dr. Jared Scherz, (audio file/podcast). The main points include: One of the most stress-producing obstacles in any relationship is the need to be right when it requires others to be wrong. Differences in school systems occur on…

Ways to Help your Child Survive your Divorce

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJuly 16, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, General Interest, Overcoming obstacles, Parent-Teacher relationships, Parenting, Parents, Social and Emotional Growth alerting schools to divorce, divorce, maintaining boundaries during divorce, respecting spouse during divorce, supporting children through divorce Leave a comment

Beyond damage control… Here are some tips to reduce the stress and anxiety you children may experience during and after your divorce. • Maintain a civil relationship with your spouse* during the divorce and afterwards. Treat each other with tolerance and respect. • Don’t badmouth your spouse to your kids regardless of your feelings for him…

Presentation: Perfectionism—What’s it Costing Our Kids?

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 26, 2016June 1, 2022 Counselors, Cultural Changes, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, General Interest, Health and Safety, Increasing Positivity, Parenting, Perfectionism, Tolerance and Respect Leave a comment

The high cost of the pressure to be perfect What’s wrong with perfectionism? Everything! Here are the causes and consequences of perfectionism—plus a few suggestions for potential “cures.” Some young people continually strive for excellence, trying to do their best, willing to make mistakes and learn from them, and take on challenges to grow their interests. Others chase perfection,…

Presentation: Motivating the Unmotivated

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 25, 2016June 1, 2022 Avoiding power struggles, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Counselors, Creating community, Differentiating Instruction, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Feedback and encouragement, Increasing Positivity, Learning styles, Motivating cooperation, Motivating your kids, Non-traditional learners, Parents, Recognition and reinforcement, School climate, Social and Emotional Growth, Win-win authority classroom climate, consequences, difficult students, effective instruction, motivating students, reduce indifference, student engagement, student success, unmotivated students Leave a comment

Getting past defenses, disinterest, and disengagement Presentation by Dr. Jane Bluestein Of all the challenges teachers face, the one mentioned most consistently over the years has been, “How do I engage kids who aren’t motivated and just don’t care?” Few things are more frustrated that having your planning and enthusiasm met with groans, shrugs, or eye…

15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy

By Luminita SaviucMay 30, 2016April 30, 2022 Avoiding burnout, Counselors, General Interest, Gratitude and inspiration, Overcoming obstacles, Relationships, Self-care and Inspiration, Taking care of yourself 2 Comments

Letting go of pain, stress, and suffering Note from Dr. Bluestein: Many of you know how picky I am about what I include on this site. This is a piece I came across a while ago and have been wanting to include it here ever since. (Included with permission from the author, Luminita Saviuc.) This list strongly…

Stress-Producing Obstacles in Relationships

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 30, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Educators, General Interest, Overcoming obstacles, Problem solving, Relationships, Self-care and Inspiration, Taking care of yourself, Win-win authority, Win-win parenting authority agendas for others, assumptions, autonomy, being present, being right, blame, change, conflict, consciousness, control, criticism, dependence, double standards, expectations, fear of abandonment, judgment, listening, making others wrong, overreacting, perfectionism, personal growth, reactivity, relationships, respect, shaming 2 Comments

Patterns to avoid Want to reduce conflict, pain, and alienation in relationships with the important people in your life? Here are some of the patterns that make connecting difficult. (Some suggestions for resolution below.) • Needing to be in charge or in control, especially when it depends on disempowering or controlling others, or when it disregards…

Does Your Confidence Propel or Sabotage You?

By Pam VincentMay 7, 2016April 30, 2022 Avoiding burnout, Counselors, Educators, General Interest, Overcoming obstacles, Perfectionism, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth, Taking care of yourself confidence, positivity, psychological strength, vulnerability Leave a comment

How confidence affects our happiness There are two different kinds of confidence a person may embrace. One comes from a strong, quiet strength and the second type comes from a fear-based confidence. Quiet confidence is an inner strength that when attained doesn’t have to be talked about or placed on a résumé; it shows in a…

Starting Over is Not Failure

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 2, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Educators, General Interest, Overcoming obstacles, Parents, Perfectionism, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth accomplishing goals, accomplishment, adversity, completion, fresh starts, goal-setting, growth, moving forward, new day, optimism, perfectionism, persistence, rebounding, resetting goals, resolutions, setbacks, starting fresh, starting over, trying again Leave a comment

Beginning a new year. Or a new day. Note, May 2, 2016: I started this post on Feb. 8, 2014 and, like many things I started during the time I was working on the perfectionism book, lost track of it before I finished. I think the idea of coming back more than 2 years later…

Ways to Build Tolerance and Respect for Diversity

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 1, 2016April 30, 2022 Counselors, Creating community, Culture and Community, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Parents, Problem solving, School climate, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect acceptance, appreciating others, appreciation for diversity, classroom social dynamics, friendship skills, leadership skills in children, opportunities for service, respect, respect for diversity, respecting differences, social competence in children, social interaction, sociograms, status among students, student social behavior, teaching tolerance, tolerance Leave a comment

Practical strategies for positive change • Pay attention to peer-to-peer interactions. Increase awareness, advocacy, and a willingness to take immediate, positive action (regarding how kids treat one another). • Advocate for the underdog. Encourage kids to connect with children who seem isolated. Emphasize the value of inclusion. • Interrupt any instances of meanness, name calling,…