When Teachers Lose Their Cool

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJune 12, 2022June 12, 2022 Building responsibility, Modeling positive behavior, Win-win authority Leave a comment

Help for kids dealing with a mean, aggressive teacher Dear Dr. Bluestein: Hello. My son is in the 5th grade. He’s an honor student was nominated by his teacher to attend a camp that teaches about leadership. My question is how does a good student deal with mean, ugly, and rude teachers? For example, a…

The Beauty of Losing Control

By Dr. Jane BluesteinApril 26, 2022April 26, 2022 Avoiding burnout, Avoiding power struggles, Beginning Teachers, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Culture and Community, Discipline, Increasing Positivity, Intervening negative behavior, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Recognition and reinforcement, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Uncategorized, Win-win authority Leave a comment

An effective way to “be in charge”! Note: This is one of the very first articles I wrote for publication—in this case, for Instructor Magazine, back in 1985. The language and approach I currently use in my work has changed significantly over the years. For example, I rarely ever use the term “obedience” anymore because I have found…

Book: The Beginning Teacher’s Survival Guide

By Dr. Jane BluesteinAugust 13, 2021April 27, 2023 Assessment and Testing, Avoiding burnout, Avoiding power struggles, Beginning Teachers, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Body and Brain, Books, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Creating community, Cultural Changes, Culture and Community, Discipline, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Feedback and encouragement, Health and Safety, Homework, Increasing Positivity, Intervening negative behavior, Leadership, Learning, Learning styles, Life Management, Mentorship, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Non-traditional learners, Parent-Teacher relationships, Problem solving, Professional growth, Recognition and reinforcement, Relationships, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Schools in Society, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth, Special Needs, Taking care of yourself, Teacher Appreciation, Teacher retention, Teaching, Teaching, Tolerance and Respect, Win-win authority avoiding power struggles, beginning teachers, boundaries, challenges for new teachers, creating community, difficult students, discipline, emotional safety, emotionally safe classroom, learning differences, parent-teacher relationships, positive consequences, professional development feedback, professional growth, professional identity, school culture, self-care, student behavior, student self-management, teacher retention, teaching

Win-Win Strategies for Success by Dr. Jane Bluestein At the start or your career or at the end of your rope… Get your teaching career off to a winning start—or recharge your passion for your work! The new & revised edition of Dr. Jane Bluestein’s pivotal guide for your teaching career! A great gift for new…

Dream Big!

By Dr. Jane BluesteinNovember 16, 2017June 10, 2022 Counselors, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Feedback and encouragement, General Interest, Increasing Positivity, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating your kids, Parenting, Parents, Problem solving, Social and Emotional Growth "i can", creativity, dream big, dreaming, emotional support, encouragement, fantasies, inspiration, listening, modeling, positivity, protectiveness, supporting children, unconditional love Leave a comment

Encouraging your children’s fantasies—and their future! It’s something a child hears often: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” A simple, even rhetorical question. But for children, this is a serious inquiry that can also be a great opportunity to share their ambitions, dreams, and creative longings. Even if the answers vary…

Checklist: Characteristics of Positive Teacher-Student Relationships

By Dr. Jane BluesteinMay 15, 2015May 2, 2022 Avoiding power struggles, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Building responsibility, Classroom management, Counselors, Creating community, Discipline, Educators, Feedback and encouragement, Intervening negative behavior, Leadership, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Parent-Teacher relationships, Problem solving, Recognition and reinforcement, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Win-win authority 2 Comments

Evaluate your relationships Use this checklist to evaluate patterns in your current relationships with your students. If you have implemented a specific discipline or motivation approach, does it encourage relationships in which the following are true? (Click here for a description of each category.) Proactivity: ___ I focus on prevention–not reaction. ___ I attempt to…

“Making Someone Wrong”

By Dr. Jane BluesteinApril 23, 2014May 3, 2022 Building responsibility, Counselors, Discipline, Educators, General Interest, Increasing Positivity, Intervening negative behavior, Intervening negative behavior, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating your kids, Parents, Problem solving, Relationships, Taking care of yourself alternative to criticism, alternatives to anger, alternatives to impatience, blaming, boundaries, calm response, criticism, culprits, expectation, impatience, justifiable anger alternatives, labeling, making people wrong, making wrong, positive behavior, responding in anger, self-care, self-care in relationships, shaming 2 Comments

What does that really mean? In what has become a bit of a family joke, my husband and I can spend the entire day together in the house. Yet, regardless of how much time we’ve been talking or interacting, something happens the minute I reach for my keys to leave for a meeting, class, or…

It’s Only Disrespect if I Think it’s Disrespect

By Dr. Jane BluesteinNovember 12, 2013July 4, 2023 Avoiding power struggles, Avoiding power struggles with your kids, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Counselors, Discipline, Educators, General Interest, Intervening negative behavior, Intervening negative behavior, Modeling positive behavior, Parents, Tolerance and Respect classroom climate, defensive kids, don't take the bait, positive interactions, school climate, snarky students, teacher-student relationships, understanding defensiveness, validation Leave a comment

Attitudes are in the eye—and ear—of the beholder Do you have snarky people in your life? This post was adapted from material originally written for beginning teachers. The same ideas and strategies are equally effective in home and work environments, as well as any educational setting. Just substitute “student” (or “kid”) for “child,” “co-worker,” or…

What’s so Hard About Win-Win?

By Dr. Jane BluesteinJanuary 8, 2013May 8, 2022 Avoiding power struggles, Behavior Management, Behavior Management, Building responsibility, Counselors, Creating community, Discipline, Educators, Emotionally safe schools, Intervening negative behavior, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating cooperation, Recognition and reinforcement, Rules and Boundaries, School climate, Win-win authority Leave a comment

Getting past old win-lose traditions This article was written for Educational Leadership magazine. A similar version appeared in the September 2011 edition of that magazine. Talk about safe, respectful schools and at some point, the term win-win is bound to come up. First coined in the 1920s by human relations and management pioneer Mary Parker…

Examples of Some New Ways of Thinking

By Dr. Jane BluesteinDecember 9, 2012June 9, 2022 Counselors, Educators, General Interest, Intervening negative behavior, Mental Health, Modeling positive behavior, Motivating your kids, Parenting, Parents, Perfectionism, Perfectionism, Relationships, Rules and Boundaries, Self-care and Inspiration, Social and Emotional Growth, Taking care of yourself, Win-win authority, Win-win parenting authority authority relationships, constructive thinking, creating more positive thinking patterns, impact of others, personal relationships, respect for others, responsibility, rules and boundaries, self-care, victim thinking, win-lose vs win-win Leave a comment

Transforming old messages into more constructive thoughts Old message: If only my students (or kids, spouse, boss, parents, the government, etc.) would change, my life would be better. New message: If my current behaviors (or thinking patterns) aren’t working for me, I am willing to change them. Old message: Other people’s actions, words and attitudes create my feelings…

Ways to Model Respect with your Children

By Dr. Jane BluesteinNovember 28, 2012May 17, 2022 Behavior Management, Counselors, Creating community, Educators, Leadership, Modeling positive behavior, Parenting, Parenting, Parents, Social and Emotional Growth, Tolerance and Respect Leave a comment

Practical ways to teach respectful behavior This list was compiled for a book for parents. Many of these tips will also apply to educators and others who work with young people. • Listen. Make eye contact when your children are talking to you. Make an effort to really hear and appreciate what your children are…