Archive | Problem solving

“Making Someone Wrong”

What does that really mean? It was just a little editorial comment in the column of the manuscript for my last book. I was explaining the power of conditional access to positive consequences, noting that it was not necessary to “make [kids] wrong or point out the error of their ways when they blow it” […]

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Presentation: Bouncing Back: Resiliency

Building Resiliency and Persistence in Our Students Presentation by Dr. Jane Bluestein How often do we see students struggling with a new challenge and just give up? Some don’t even try, and can invent all sorts of excuses— sometimes with their parents’ support— to avoid the risk we all need to take when we’re learning […]

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An Alternative to Advice Giving

Asking questions to guide problem solving The questions that follow are provided to help with the mechanics of mastering the technique of “asking—not telling,” an effective alternative to giving kids advice that encourages independence and problem-solving competence. The questions are (more…)

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Non-Supportive Responses to Avoid

Yes, these really do make things worse! If people trust us enough to share an experience that has had an emotional impact on them, we usually do the most good when we can respond with empathy and support. Unfortunately, the following non-supportive or negative responses are so common and pervasive in our culture that avoiding […]

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Improving Student Behavior through Positive School Climate

It’s not about the rules! From the January 2013 newsletter: There is a strange myth around kids’ behavior that if we just have enough rules (and severe enough punishments), the misbehaviors will disappear. What I’ve observed, however, is an even stranger reality in which the opposite tends to be true. In schools, the longer the […]

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Ways to Improve the School’s Social Culture

Practical strategies for positive change • Pay attention to peer-to-peer interactions. Increase awareness, advocacy, and a willingness to take immediate, positive action (regarding how kids treat one another). • Advocate for the underdog. Encourage kids to connect with children who seem isolated. Emphasize the value of inclusion. • Interrupt any instances of meanness, name calling, […]

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Expert on Bullying Discusses Ways to Reduce the Problem

Interview by Grace Merritt with Dr. Jane Bluestein © 2010, from the Hartford Courant, reported April 14, 2010 Dr. Jane Bluestein, an author and expert on bullying and creating a positive school environment, was the keynote speaker last week at a statewide conference on bullying prevention for teachers, school leaders, and parents. Bluestein believes that fostering […]

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The Dignity Stance

Tips for responding to meanness or bullying by Naomi Drew Note from Jane Bluestein: Ms. Drew recommends teaching kids the following strategies. I think this information would also be valuable for adults in a similar situation. (more…)

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Bullying Checklist for Kids

Check Your Behavior Take this self-test to find out if you’re doing anything that’s considered to be bullying. Do you do any of the following on a regular basis? –  Purposely try to make another person feel bad. –  Make fun of people to hurt or embarrass them. –  Engage in lots of name-calling. – […]

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7 Steps to Bully-Proofing Kids

Ways to Increase Confidence and Decrease Vulnerability 1. Teach them to value their self-worth. Every child needs to know they don’t have to look, act, dress, learn, or be like everyone else to be worthy of respect. Affirm their talents, strengths, and competencies so they can always remember who they are at the core, regardless […]

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Bearing Witness

Support for children in crisis Teachers historically have been evaluated and rewarded for their academic performance. As a result, many teachers underestimate their own helping skills. —William Fibkins Tears are the language of the limbic brain. They ought not to be restricted. —Elaine DeBeaufort and Aura Sofia Diaz I write entirely to find out what […]

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Presentation: Pushing Prevention

Preventing Substance Abuse and Other Addictive and Destructive Behaviors Presentation for educators or parents by Dr. Jane Bluestein All the catchy slogans, informational posters, warnings and after-school specials in the world typically do not address the basic needs that can make drug use (and all mood-altering substances and behaviors) so attractive to kids. (more…)

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Presentation: “No Really, I’m Fine!”

Connecting with kids in emotional distress Presentation for educators or parents by Dr. Jane Bluestein How often do troubled or upset kids attempt to open up to the adults in their lives, only to encounter a non-supportive, ineffective, or even destructive response? Unintentional or not, it’s no wonder so many upset kids try to convince […]

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Presentation: Bearing Witness

Support for Kids in Crisis Presentation for educators and parents by Dr. Jane Bluestein Stress in a child’s life can have a huge impact on learning, attention, achievement, and behavior. Whether a problem at home, a recent loss or family trauma, abuse, neglect, academic pressure, or social strains and problems with peers, this program looks […]

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Presentation: 21st Century Discipline

Responding to the Needs of Today’s Students Presentation for educators by Dr. Jane Bluestein Of all the issues concerning teachers, discipline generally tops the list. All our preparation, enthusiasm and instructional expertise won’t get us much without the (more…)

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Presentation: Conflict in the Classroom

Attacking Problems, Not People! Presentation for educators by Dr. Jane Bluestein Do you ever find yourself in the middle of squabbles between your students? Do peers try to draw you into their conflicts? Are aggressive parents or uncooperative colleagues a presence in your life? If so, the energy devoted to these conflicts is having an […]

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