Archive | Counselors

Checklist: Characteristics of Positive Teacher-Student Relationships

Evaluate your relationships Use this checklist to evaluate patterns in your current relationships with your students. If you have implemented a specific discipline or motivation approach, does it encourage relationships in which the following are true? (Click here for a description of each category.) Proactivity: ___ I focus on prevention–not reaction. ___ I attempt to […]

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I-Messages: The Handout

More information about a destructive communication pattern This handout was developed to accompany a free online article, “What’s Wrong with ‘I-Messages’?” I first wrote about the problems with using this formula to try to get people to change their behavior in 1991. Evidence based on outcomes of using this formula has only strengthened my opinion. There are […]

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The Problem with Zero Tolerance and Push Out Strategies

How these programs are making things worse On March 4, 2015, I had the privilege of keynoting the National Youth At Risk Conference for the second time. In meeting with many of the participants who attended the keynote and my follow-up session, as well as what I’ve observed in my visits to schools around the country and […]

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Preventing Bullying in the Digital Age

Understanding and managing cyberspace aggression Guest blogger Amy Williams shares what to watch for and how to prevent meanness in the digital age. The ripple effect of bullying can be felt across all lanes of life. Similar to raging drivers on the road, aggressive Internet users can create a threatening environment for the people around them. […]

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9 Ways to Encourage Your Children’s Individuality

Appreciating your children’s uniqueness Even if your children are the spitting image of you, unless they are clones, you know that they are going to be different from you. And if you do indeed have more than one, they are going to be different from one another. This uniqueness contributes to the “personality” of your family, a potential […]

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Presentations: Two- and Three-Day Training Seminars

Opportunities for groups to explore various topics in greater depth In recent years, my work has focused on program keynotes and full-day training programs. On occasion, I have been afforded the luxury of extending the training over two or three days. I have decided to offer these seminars once again, so if you have a […]

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Presentation: Parents in a Pressure Cooker

A comprehensive and positive approach for parents and caregivers Dozens of practical, positive, and effective strategies to help parents build kids’ cooperation, responsibility, and self-management in a caring, mutually-respectful, win-win environment. This program was designed as a half-day, full-day, or multi-day training to combine the discipline issues and power dynamics addressed in “You Can’t Make Me!”, with […]

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13 Manières de Créer un Model de Respect pour votre Enfant

Par Jane Bluestein Ph.D. • Ecoutez. Regardez-le dans les yeux quand votre enfant vous parle.• Frappez avant d’entrer dans la chambre de votre enfant, surtout si la porte est fermée. • Employez le type de langage et le ton de voix qui serait acceptable si votre enfant vous parlait. • Appréciez le besoin qu’a votre enfant de s’amuser […]

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36 Choses que Vous Pouvez Faire Pour Vous Sentir Bien

Par Jane Bluestein Ph.D. • Faites quelque chose que vous avez longtemps retardé. • Essayez une nouvelle recette ou un nouveau restaurant. • Ecrivez une lettre à quelqu’un de spécial. • Réparez quelque chose qui a été cassé. • Dites une blague à quelqu’un. • Offrez-vous un soin de visage, une manucure ou un massage (ou tous les trois!) • Promenez-vous pour […]

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“Making Someone Wrong”

What does that really mean? It was just a little editorial comment in the column of the manuscript for my last book. I was explaining the power of conditional access to positive consequences, noting that it was not necessary to “make [kids] wrong or point out the error of their ways when they blow it” […]

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The Gift of Service: Certificate

Download page for Service Certificates Click here to download a page with two copies of a certificate you can duplicate to offer the gift of your service to someone in your life. This page corresponds to Chapter 4, “The Pleasures of Service,” in Magic, Miracles and Synchronicity by Jane Bluestein, Judy Lawrence, and S.J. Sanchez. See below […]

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Angels in Disguise: Certificate

Download page for Angel Certificates Click here to download a page with two copies of a certificate you can duplicate to recognize and acknowledge the Angels in Disguise who enrich your life. These “angels” could be family and friends, or they could be helpers, service people, or total strangers who add to your life with […]

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Drunken Danse Macabre

A tale of two departed alcoholics John A chronic alcoholic, a phone call, the police, and devastating news: the formula of tragedy. Found dead in his apartment at forty-seven years of age, John’s death was not a surprise. His lifelong alcohol and drug induced pseudo-nirvana had ended. Any hope for a spiritual awakening, possibility of […]

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Book: Managing 21st Century Classrooms

How do I avoid ineffective classroom management practices? You know all those behavior management strategies we learned to use? Well guess what! Some of them are actually making things worse! It’s long past time for our approach to classroom management to catch up to the kids we’re teaching. This book explores common misconceptions about classroom management […]

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Obedient vs. Cooperative Behavior

There is a difference! As you can imagine, my perceptions and ideas about children’s behavior have evolved over the years, including shifts in the vocabulary and conceptual framework I use in my writing and seminars. These changes have been especially evident in relation to the concepts I explore in this post. Because it’s so easy […]

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It’s Only Disrespect if I Think it’s Disrespect

Attitudes are in the eye— and ear— of the beholder Do you have snarky people in your life? This post was adapted from material originally written for beginning teachers. The same ideas and strategies are equally effective in home and work environments, as well as any educational setting. Just substitute “student” (or “kid”) for “child,” […]

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Homework Rating Scale

A self-assessment for educators* By Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller *Parents: Use this assessment to rate the value of your children’s homework assignments. The drive to assign more and more homework to children at younger ages is in full force in many schools. The desire to increase achievement and raise the test scores has fueled […]

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