Behavior Management

10 Dangers of Encouraging Obedience and People-Pleasing

June 9, 2013 Behavior Management

It’s not as desirable as it sounds! Parents can’t choose the mates of their children or the behavior of their children. You actually can’t choose anything for your children without disempowering them. —Abraham* Most of the parents and teachers with whom I work come to my presentations (especially ones like “You Can’t Make Me!” and [...]

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“Magic” Sentences for Effective Communication

March 28, 2013 Avoiding power struggles

 Positive language for avoiding conflict, negotiating agreements, and taking care of yourself “Magic Sentences” are key phrases that offer practical ways to use specific language to prevent, minimize, or de-escalate conflicts with others. Different sentences will be useful in different situations. These examples represent a win-win approach to relationships, and while they were originally developed for [...]

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Leading Learning with Glenn Capelli

January 26, 2013 Body and Brain

The art, science, and craft of teaching Episode Summary: Did you ever have a teacher who changed your life? Dr. Jane Bluestein talks with author, speaker, and songwriter Glenn Capelli about how teachers can have a powerful impact on a child’s life— for good or bad. They discuss the importance of new and different experiences, including [...]

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What’s Wrong with I-Messages?

January 14, 2013 Avoiding power struggles

Problems with a popular formula © 1991, 1999, 2003, 2013 This article was originally written for an issue of Families in Recovery, a parenting magazine that is no longer in print. Although the examples primarily feature parent-child interactions, the dynamics, issues, and alternatives are applicable to any relationship. A man in one of my workshops [...]

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Improving Student Behavior through Positive School Climate

January 13, 2013 Behavior Management

It’s not about the rules! From the January 2013 newsletter: There is a strange myth around kids’ behavior that if we just have enough rules (and severe enough punishments), the misbehaviors will disappear. What I’ve observed, however, is an even stranger reality in which the opposite tends to be true. In schools, the longer the [...]

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Stressful or Painful School Experiences

January 6, 2013 Counselors

Events and experiences that can compromise emotional safety The items on this list were compiled from a number of print resources as well as surveys and interviews conducted over a two-year period. (Many items suggested in the literature overlapped or were repeatedly expressed in interviews and surveys.) Feel free to add your own observations and experiences [...]

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Ways to Improve the School’s Social Culture

January 6, 2013 Counselors

Practical strategies for positive change • Pay attention to peer-to-peer interactions. Increase awareness, advocacy, and a willingness to take immediate, positive action (regarding how kids treat one another). • Advocate for the underdog. Encourage kids to connect with children who seem isolated. Emphasize the value of inclusion. • Interrupt any instances of meanness, name calling, [...]

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Rules and Boundaries

December 17, 2012 Avoiding power struggles

Effectively creating structure in your classroom When I started teaching, I had some reservations about being completely in charge and responsible for the rules, so I tried involving the students in this task. Part of my intention was an honest stab at building a positive, win-win classroom environment, wanting to acknowledge the students’ needs for [...]

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Ways to Model Respect with your Children

November 28, 2012 Behavior Management

Practical ways to teach respectful behavior This list was compiled for a book for parents. Many of these tips will also apply to educators and others who work with young people. • Listen. Make eye contact when your children are talking to you. Make an effort to really hear and appreciate what your children are [...]

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Presentation: Becoming a Win-Win Teacher

November 9, 2012 Avoiding burnout

Success with Kids, Parents, and Colleagues Presentation by Dr. Jane Bluestein Oh, the challenges of becoming an educator in today’s fast-changing world! We’ll explore what keeps so many schools rooted in win-lose philosophies and practices, personal assets that will increase the odds of your survival and success, and specific strategies for winning in a win-lose system.

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Presentation: Character Counts

November 6, 2012 Behavior Management

Building Relationships that Build Character Presentation for educators or parents by Dr. Jane Bluestein It’s one thing to expect or demand certain desirable character traits in kids—and another to create an environment in which these behaviors are likely to emerge!

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Presentation: 21st Century Discipline

November 6, 2012 Avoiding power struggles

Responding to the Needs of Today’s Students Presentation for educators by Dr. Jane Bluestein Of all the issues concerning teachers, discipline generally tops the list. All our preparation, enthusiasm and instructional expertise won’t get us much without the

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Spanish “Pads” on the Back™ Template

October 25, 2012 Counselors

Download the “Pads” on the Back™ Template in Spanish by Dr. Jane Bluestein & Lynn Collins, Ph.D. These are two of the eight different messages on the PDF. By clicking on the link below you agree to keep the copyright notice on this page and to distribute or share these materials for free. Click here to [...]

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Italian “Pads” on the Back™ Template

October 24, 2012 Counselors

Download the “Pads” on the Back™ Template in Italian by Dr. Jane Bluestein & Lynn Collins, Ph.D. These are two of the eight different messages on the PDF. By clicking on the link below you agree to keep the copyright notice on this page and to distribute or share these materials for free. Click here to [...]

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English “Pads” on the Back™ Template

October 24, 2012 Counselors

Download the “Pads” on the Back™ Template in English by Dr. Jane Bluestein & Lynn Collins, Ph.D. These are two of the eight different messages on the PDF. By clicking on the link below you agree to keep the copyright notice on this page and to distribute or share these materials for free. Click here to [...]

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“Pads” on the Back Templates

October 23, 2012 Counselors

A world of positivitity! 44 FREE “Pads” on the Back™ Templates in 42 world languages (so far) by Dr. Jane Bluestein & Lynn Collins, Ph.D. Download for FREE! (Click here to go directly to the languages for your free downloads.) The same 8 sentence starters in our original pre-printed “Pads” on the Back are now available in [...]

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Creating an Environment of Resiliency in School with David Friedli

September 30, 2012 Behavior Management

Three ingredients for success Episode Summary: Dr. Jane Bluestein talks with principal David Friedli about resiliency from the standpoint of how a balanced approach of

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No Kidding About Bullying with Naomi Drew

September 30, 2012 Behavior Management

A constructive approach to a serious subject Episode Summary: What bullying looks like and the impact it has on children. Dr. Jane Bluestein talks with Naomi Drew about bullying words and actions, which could include teasing, making fun of someone, name calling, giving someone dirty looks or rolling eyes, excluding someone, or any physical event meant to [...]

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